How the Hell Am I Going to Blog While Biking?

     So, this thought popped into my bean: I'm going to be biking, no computer in tow, so HOW am I'm going to blog?  Wah waaaaaaaaaah!  I'm too cheap to buy one of those schnazzy phones with millions of applications I'll never use.  I use my phone to call, text, and occasionally take a picture.  Pretty basic, nothing fancy. But, with this blog as my love child, I can't just leave it to fend for itself for a week, or your imaginations for that matter.  The whole point of creating a blog is to blog, right?  Someone gifted me a phone that has internet capabilities, and I may just activate that phone for the month of my ride so that I can post short yet detailed updates.  I'll also be keeping a recorded verbal log of my trip, that way I won't forget anything that I want to post.  I'll take 1.5 million pictures, I'm sure, so your eyes won't be deprived of the visual aspect.  Blasted, this is turning into an Oops Baby Blog--more and more crap to keep up with and invest in that I didn't anticipate.  That's the name of the adventure game, I guess.
    
     As far as training is concerned--NADA yet.  Baltimore was shat on with snow last week to the point that 1 of the 2 days I actually have to go to school each week was cancelled.  My electricity was out for 24 hours too.  Snow and roadbikes don't get along very well, and if you know ANYTHING about [Baltimore] Maryland drivers it's no surprise that the majority of them were in the ditch or some other form of "accident" that evening... they are atrocious drivers out here!  I could have biked yesterday, but I've been lazy to be blunt.. like the guy below.

P.S. I've done this--and I ended up with a scraped & bruised arm because the dog stopped and my arm didn't.  My arm made sweet love to the window frame and it yanked some of the top skin off.  Don't do it.

Anywho's, blogging and biking.  Training.  Equipment.  

     So much to do.  I set up the tent for the first time!  I took everything out of the bag the first night I had it to make sure nothing was missing--all parts are accounted for.  The only problem I had was that my kitten thought it was the GREATEST new jungle gym for him to play in.  NOPE!  I kicked him out of the bedroom until I had made sure that I could set it up easily and quickly; I didn't want to chance my little Sabertooth's ability to snag the material and rip/slash it (Lord knows my shower curtain looks like streamers from him jumping, latching, then sliding down it with his machete-like claws.  Luckily my water pressure is so low that the water wouldn't ever come close to coming into contact with the curtain).
     I bought maps of the states I'm going to be trekking through too, minus West Virginia.  I simply couldn't find one at Barnes & Noble.  Every other useless place, but no West Virginia.  I've been creating maps on Google for the trip, and I think that I'll post them AFTER I've gotten to a place and moved on so that people can see my route.  I just don't want to give away my position to the enemy in the time of war, if you catch my drift.
     Well, time to practice singing so that I sound glorious for my recital when I return home at the end of the trip.  Most of the people there wouldn't know the difference if I screwed up a Czech, German, Russian, French, Italian, etc. word, but I will.